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MEDITATION ON WHITE

(TRACED BACKWARDS), RESPONSE

TO ARSHILE GORKY’S CHARRED BELOVED I, 1946

 

Named after lilies, his mother Shushan warmed

her infants  in cradles lined with sand, grew daughters

to face east and hail Mary. Each November, string-tied

from the ceilings, she dried pears, their skins distilled

with rippled sugar and the deathly

 

look of withdrawal; the fruits

parched as embalmed song birds or small raptors

swathed in Egypt. Her one son, his voice-

 

box drowned with balsam, would not speak

until he was six, until six spoke only with birds. This,

a small sacrifice for the close studies of such wings, white 

doves he let roost in his breaking.

 

SPRINGS, WHY WE NEED TO STAY

AWAY FROM NEW YORK CITY

Lee Krasner addresses Jackson Pollock

 

If I lose my place on Rimbaud’s page like a schoolboy who can’t find the cigar box he buried in his father’s orchard and our morning glories decide to stay social past noon, if the seed packets on the dry bricks aren’t restless when my hand moves over yours so the sun’s shadows melt all fingers into the same sober shape and my skin sticks to you with heat and stays there, then I will decide to turn a blind eye to the border collie sleeping loudly on your mound of clean laundry and know this moment’s sadness has no spine.

MAHOGANY CABINET

 

Forgotten furniture

in an empty room, she is dark wood

unwanted.  He wants

to want her, to save her

from rot; grabs hold

of the handles, pulls

open the bones 

shelves muscle-thick

where something breakable sits.

Is this a heart

or a tea cup?

He can’t decide,

fills it with warm bergamot

and sees if he can sip,

if the sun flows through

as he holds it against the light,

if there are porcelain roses

painted, if he can pet the blooms

with his baby finger.

He pretends

that it can’t chip,

that all tea leaves tell

happy endings. 

That the heart is not

a hollow organ.

RETROSPECTIVE

Sleep was a gift; we woke before the alarm,

lay still in stolen minutes. It was easier to breathe

before the clock radio talked, before

the shower made mist and morning coffee dripped.

 

It was your breath that kept me, a prayer plant

folding inward without light.

 

I have stored that slow sound,

your pencil across paper; the scent

of your hair washed and wet on skin.

How you punctured my blister

with a pin, cleaned the cracked scab

when I came back to you, bleeding.

 

That band-aid was the only thing

I took with me when I left.  My body

breaks when I remember your hands,

how easily they touched that wound.

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